YOU Matter: How to Better Yourself After a Break-Up

girl taking bath

YOU Matter: How to Better Yourself After a Break-Up


It’s a fact that we tend to neglect a number of things when we’re in a relationship. We often put our friends and family members on hold. We fail to attend activities outside the relationship, like work picnics, school reunions, and church events. We also may have put ourselves on the back burner – catering to our significant other at all times.

If you’ve experienced the end of a relationship and are finding you need a little push to get back on your feet, here are 5 ways you can better yourself after a break-up.

Person read book and drink coffee

Work through it and NOT around it!

We all have a habit of working around our issues rather than working through them. It’s much more comfortable to ignore the root of the problems that ultimately caused the break-up and what you can do to help avoid a repeat. Address any issues that are your fault. Work on changing those things within yourself. Vow to not attract to toxic people. Commit to demanding respect. You are only a victim of a relationship if you allow yourself to be.

Take care of yourself!

Determine that you deserve love and that you will love yourself, first and foremost. If you don’t, no one else truly can. You’ll always sell yourself short in a relationship. Work on positive affirmations, personal growth, and self-acceptance. The rest of your life, including future relationships, will begin to fall into place once you do these things.

Do tears equal fears?

It’s very common to react to fear by wallowing in the grief of a failed relationship. Are you really sad the relationship is over? Or, are you really just fearful of being single and “alone”? By analyzing what went wrong in the relationship and what it was REALLY like, you may find that you’re not really sad at all. Face the fears and you’ll conquer all.

Celebrate independence.

Being single isn’t such a bad thing if you see the good things in it. What things were you not able to do because you were in a relationship? Did you not have time to take some courses, go for a promotion, spend time with family and friends, or spend time of a beloved hobby? Do at least one thing you couldn’t or wouldn’t do when you were busy being in a relationship. Paint the apartment pink. Join a single’s group. Your time is now your own. Celebrate being single!

When it’s time…dive in and swim. Just because one relationship sank doesn’t mean the next one will. Once you’ve taken the time to get over the relationship and take care of yourself for a while if the opportunity presents itself for another one to surface, go for it. Just remember the lessons you’ve learned.

Wave the past goodbye!

Girl happy

When you are giving your old relationship a send-off, the suggestions above will help you embark on a brand new journey. Figure out what floats your boat and DO IT. Get on board with some fun and exciting things that propel you forward. Above all, don’t let the self-improvements you’ve made leave you shipwrecked again. Live, learn, and love on.

As Toby Mac says, “Forget the past. Remember the lesson.”

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